Sunday, September 26, 2010

This One's For You

This one's for you, Nyah.
I've always been that awkward girl coming into your studio when you were at your peak. You're in that circle of friends in our studio that I'm trying and trying to work myself into, but I just always feel like the outsider. Individually, I'm a sorta friend to all. but if I were to leave, not many would notice or care. However, I've always looked at you and thought, why can't I dance like her?  You're an amazing dancer. You can hip hop like no one's business, but you are also at the very top in ballet. You completely excel at jazz and lyrical and contemporary and modern and any other dance there is. You're flat in splits. You're so amazing and beautiful to me, even though to you, I'm the weird tall girl in the corner, breathing hard, hair falling out, trying to push her leg higher and higher and not coming close to where yours is. I look at your pictures on facebook, and you're just so cool. You don't try and you don't have to. Sometimes you are doing a secret smile and you seem so mysterious. Other times you're just doing a peace sign, and that says it all.  When you're smiling, or laughing, everyone wonders what joke they're missing out on. Don't you ever put yourself down.  Not that I'd know if you did, but simply because you just deserve more.

This one's for you, Addy.
I've always secretly wanted to be your friend.  Last year, I would see you walking down the hallways with your bag on your hip [even when we weren't supposed to have bags] and I wondered how you could get away with anything.  I'd see you laughing with a bunch of guys, laughing with a bunch of girls, or just simply laughing and I'd wish I were laughing with you. When we were sluffing act two rehearsal that one time for Joseph, and you, me, and dani were talking, I was so amazed that you were talking to me.  and when I started talking, you looked at me and listened. That was so amazing to me.  In my yearbook, you wrote, "You have no idea how much you mean to me."  When I read that, I had no idea what you meant.  I could only assume that you wrote that in a bunch of people's yearbooks simply to be writing something, and that made me sad.  I wished you had meant it.  Then we started talking on facebook and we got tighter and you said, I think we should be sisters. That made me so happy. I was so happy.  I'm still so happy that you're my friend and that you talk to me every night. tell me everything. I love it, and I love you. Thank you for giving me confidence.

This one's for you, Stevie.
Boys are jerks, you can't get around it.  But I love you.  I'll always be here. you know that's true.  You should find the guy that I'll approve of and maybe he won't break your heart, yes? :)

This one's for you, Blaze.
I love you.


Love, StarFish.

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