Every Summer Has A Story.

There's gotta be somebody for me out there.

 What's funny about saying that, the Summer and the Story and everything,

is that last year,

the Summer's story was about trying to get to know him,

and this year,

it's about trying to get over him.

it's funny how much changes in a year,

and the year is about to start again,

what plot twist is coming?

Here's a secret or two about what might change.

I'm scared of not being asked to the dances (call me lame. I just don't want to feel like I'm back tracking from this past year).

I'm scared every time that I work podium that he will come in with a date.

I'm scared that Stevie will move in with Russell and forget about me.

I'm scared that Connor will go on his mission and come back and not even remember me because it feels like we only just became friends.

I'm scared that Justyn and I will become estranged again.

I'm scared that I won't ever see Kristen, or Eliza, or Amy, or any of the other seniors again.

and the list goes on.

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(Greetings from the land where all feelings fly out of your body and onto the keyboard in a jumbled mess.)

love always, laura elizabeth.

let's run away to neverland, we will leave all our fans, 'cause growing up...it hurts.

So after what seems like forever of taking notes on a dumb handbook and reading a book that continually causes me to feel depressed, but forcing myself to read it anyway so it'll be done before it has to be, my head is spinning with the lyrics that my best friend plucked from the stars and my eyes are brimming with what can only be loneliness, regret, or the feeling that I am not enough.  After writing a long post filled with self-pity and sadness, however, I feel drained and silly.  Who am I to complain when I have a roof over my head and food to eat?  So I deleted all the words I wrote and decided to write some different ones instead.

School starts in a week.  I'm less than excited.

Goodnight.

Unfortunately, something I can't ignore is that there are still so many things left on my Summer bucket list.  A couple of them are things I can't do myself.  Why I put things on there that are completely up to others was stupid and I have no idea why I did it but I did and now I have to face the disappointment.  I hate not finishing things.

But tomorrow I will put on a brave face and go and sing for an hour.  I will go and finally do something I have been putting off since my birthday.  I will waste as much time that is left, and then I will go and be my best friend's biggest fan.

Love, Laura.