Every Summer Has A Story.

There's gotta be somebody for me out there.

 What's funny about saying that, the Summer and the Story and everything,

is that last year,

the Summer's story was about trying to get to know him,

and this year,

it's about trying to get over him.

it's funny how much changes in a year,

and the year is about to start again,

what plot twist is coming?

Here's a secret or two about what might change.

I'm scared of not being asked to the dances (call me lame. I just don't want to feel like I'm back tracking from this past year).

I'm scared every time that I work podium that he will come in with a date.

I'm scared that Stevie will move in with Russell and forget about me.

I'm scared that Connor will go on his mission and come back and not even remember me because it feels like we only just became friends.

I'm scared that Justyn and I will become estranged again.

I'm scared that I won't ever see Kristen, or Eliza, or Amy, or any of the other seniors again.

and the list goes on.

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(Greetings from the land where all feelings fly out of your body and onto the keyboard in a jumbled mess.)

love always, laura elizabeth.

I like to believe in love.

you say you love rain,

but you open your umbrella.

you say you love the sun,

but you find a shadow spot.

you say you love the wind,

but you close your windows.

this is why i am afraid,

you say you love me too.

--William Shakespeare.

Sometimes I listen to songs and I am struck with their brilliancy.

Like, "Great Escape" or "The Middle" or "Gold Forever"

or a bunch of other songs.

Sometimes I listen to songs and I am struck with inspiration,

and I want to just get up and dance,

like "Too Close" and "Wild One" and "Lightning".

Sometimes I listen to songs and I am struck down with memories,

sometimes the memories make me smile

like "Long Live" and "Forget You" and "Club Can't Handle Me"

and sometimes they make me curl up for a moment,

hoping that someday I will be able to listen to them peacefully again,

like "How To Save A Life" and "Drops of Jupiter" and two whole cds full.

So sometimes, when songs like these come on, I just have to try to forget.

love always, laura elizabeth.

Life and Love: an examination.

"But why ever would you say you wouldn't talk to me even if you wanted to?"

"Because even I have to make hardships for myself sometimes."

"So you're saying it's going to be a hard week?"

"No, it's going to be good. It's going to be a very, very good week."

"Why so good?"

"Because it's when you're doing what you love that you'll remember most, and it's what you remember that'll make you happy in life."

"Mom, what's the point in life?"

"Tate, I don't think I can answer that."

"Why not?"

"The point of life is something each individual person has to find for his or herself."

I've examined life, I've examined love, I've looked at pictures and memorized lines and read a play and found new style and biked a bit, but that doesn't mean I've seen anything yet, does it? It doesn't mean I've learned anything important, does it? It doesn't mean it's ever going to be time to give up, does it?

Does it?

love always, laura elizabeth.

post script: YOLO. ...SLIHYWT.

(you only live once, so live it how you want to.)



Time block.

Time Block (n): Refers to a long absence in between blog posts, not due to lack of things to write about, but to the amount of time in a day.

...And I doubt I'll ever let myself slow my life down to get over it. Sorry, those who say they diligently check my blog.

I cause a lot of problems. Surprise.

Where to begin?  I answered Mitchell on March...31. Kelsey and I went to his house and she helped me put glow in the dark stars ("YES") on his ceiling. It looks way sweet, I gotta say.

Footloose...was incredible. The absolute most incredible thing I've ever been through. What I remember most, is every night, right before the show, we would do prayer circles. While whoever wanted to was saying the prayer, I looked at every single face in the circle. Without fail, every night, it brought me to tears. Closing night I didn't even get halfway through the circle. These people...they are the best people, basically. We don't all like each other, but when it comes down to it, we've shared something deep and more spiritual than I can explain. J is incredible. It's all incredible.

Spring Break was, in a word, the BEST. I wasn't home any of the nights until midnight (except one night, because I got moody). I got burned (it's tan now, yay!). I reconnected with one of the best people I know--shout out to Justyn! Love you girl--and now she's in my prom group--yay!! It was great to remember what an awesome person she is. I hung out with both my best friend and my boyfriend all break. Today kind of sucked, though. There's school tomorrow. I didn't do everything I said I was going to last week (or last night, for that matter). Ohhhhh wellllll. When I convince myself that Summer's right around the corner, good grades don't seem as important. (Randomly got a four oh again last term, though. I literally do not know how it happened.)

Got a prom dress. It's really, really beautiful. I'd put a picture on, but I'm scared Mitchell would see it before the big day. Did I mention it's on my birthday? I'm trying to convince my mom to pay for me and two friends (Mitchell and Kelsey, I'm sure) to go to Lagoon after school the day before, because all I asked for for my birthday were old school roller skates...She told me she's already done with my birthday, which makes me suspect she got way more than I need, as usual. Oh well. We'll see.

Unless you haven't gotten it from this post, my life is amazing. I love it, even with all the drama (mostly that I create for myself) and the homework (although--why stress about it when I know I'm not going to do it?....this might be a very bad term for me) and the missing of important things (if you can find my $50 or my kindle fire, please please please let me know... I'm really freaked out about it). My friends doubly make up for all of it. I just hope every day of Summer will be like Tuesday this past week (minus the sunburn).

Anyway. Happy school tomorrow. T-minus two weeks until birthday. T-minus six weeks until Summer.

WE CAN DO THIS.

love always, laura elizabeth.

Independance is a state of mind.

The most amazing sight is looking up and having colors blasting your sky into a million pieces for one perfect moment, and then having another one come again.  The most amazing feeling is the anticipation of seeing a light streak through the air, and then feeling the sight resonate deep into my bones.

Don't take your freedom for granted.

There ain't no doubt
I love this land
God bless the USA.

Love, Laura.

Post Script:  Thank you to everyone who made my fourth so fantastic.  It was the best of my memory, thanks you you all. So much love.

A watched window shows no friends.

It's funny because the word "cluck" looks like "duck", but that's the
sounds chickens make, not ducks.  It's very misleading.

...It's funny what a day alone can do to your mental health.

Later usually turns into never.  Proven.

Thanks, Kelsey, for saving the day at eight o'clock.

Love to her and others that I love,
Laura.

Could Not Be More Excited.

Now, when did I deserve such good friends?

-miss kelsey, I just got your post-it note. You're so beautiful

and I am so much more blessed than you.

I did have a good day. (:

-dear sunshine, I could not be happier to be happy.

thank you for standing by me when I

most needed it.

-miss justyn, I love you.  Even though sometimes I feel

like I don't belong in the role of

one of your best friends.

-miss dani, we will get together soon. no matter

if you can or can't.

And many more who contribute to my over all contentment--

All my love, Laura.

You make me jealous of the me in my daydreams.

My new decision:  I will become a complete social outcast.  Why?  Because I can't stand stupid, vapid, manipulative girls or vulgar, oblivious, manipulative boys.

My newer decision:  I will NOT become a complete social outcast.  Why not?  Because I could never live without my friends.

I've been talkin' with a boy named Jake lately.  He's Voldemort's best friend (but it's fine).  He likes to pretend he cares about nothing and he likes to never show emotion.  I've been working on that.  I told him about my new decision and he said he was already a social outcast.  I don't believe it, not fully.  I talked about my happy world where only the people I love existed and he said he could be happy in a world of just him.  I don't believe that either.  No one could live forever with no one else.  But he is dead set on being alone.  It's sad.  I don't think anyone should ever be alone like that.  I don't think he fully realizes what it'd be like.

I've also been working on my friendship with an amazing, beautiful girl (see tags) that, a few months ago, fell into a crowd that....how can I put this?... is one of the reasons of my new decision.  But she still contributed to my newer decision.  Talking with her, and seeing her last Saturday, it reminded me why we had been friends in the first place, and I miss her so much.  She says she wants a break from those friends, but I don't really know how it will happen when they are never seen apart.  Love, I know you read my blog, and I want you to know I'll always be there for you when you need it.

Sorry this post doesn't belong in this tab.  I just wanted to show some reasoning behind my two, contradicting decisions.  And I had to include a shoutout to the lovely girl in the above paragraph, because .... Just because.  Thank you to ALL my friends for not being stupid, vapid, and/or manipulative.

So much love (because only people I love read my blog),

StarFish.

Post Script:  This was actually Thursday, May 12.  Blogger is being stupid.  The post under this was today (Friday the Thirteenth).

Cardigans in a Camera Case.

What a beautiful day. <3

"Love is like infinity. You can't have more or less infinity, and you can't compare two things to see if they're "equally infinite". Infinity just is, and that's the way love is too."

Love your friends.  Trust your friends.  Spill all to your friends.

I love friends.

So much love,

Laura.

PS, who knew Elephanto still read my blog?